Be your own best friend

So I’ve had a bit of a break from the blog. Cue lots of the usual being annoyed at myself, chastising myself and the like. Then I remembered the advice of being your own best friend, and asking myself what I’d say to a friend who gave themselves a break to focus on important life stuff, and do a bit of self-preservation.

What would I say? I’d tell them they should cut themselves some slack, focus on what feels good, and come back to the non-essential stuff when the time is right. Which, thankfully, feels right about now.

Why did I need to self-preserve? Well, I’ve moved house. And the house happens to be in a totally different city, so I’ve also moved jobs. I’ve done this on my own, without H, to a city I don’t know, where I have only one friend (hi Kate!). So, in short, four months ago I decided to completely throw pretty much everything in my life up in the air and I’m now watching where it lands. I’ve moved to Oxford for a great job, and hopefully a great new city and location, although time will tell. H visits for long weekends, and for now, we’re making it work.

I’ve set up a whole new house from scratch, I’m now a weekday single dog mum, I’m running a new team in work, meeting new clients, trying to impress a new boss. I’m calling my friends who are now scattered across even more cities than they were at the start of the year and hoping I’ve done a good thing with my life, and that H and I will look back in a year and think ‘this will all be worth it’. Until I know we’ll do that (who can see round corners?!) I’m just keeping the faith.

But if it’s not, it’s an adventure and I believe good things come from being brave, saying yes, and trying new things even if they don’t work out. That’s what I tell my friends (and I believe it when I tell them), and it’s something I’m slowly beginning to tell myself too. Why is it so hard to take our own advice?! It’s something we must train ourselves to do!

I saw a chance to change my life, potentially for the better, but I didn’t know (and still don’t) if that would come true. I was happy, but not as happy as I knew deep down that I could be, so what harm can come from trying something new? It’s been tough so far, but with some good moments too. I’d tell my friend to hang in there and be patient, so that’s what I’m doing too. I’m glad to say I’m back writing and reviewing which always makes me feel more like me.

My first impressions on my new city are:

  1. It’s so green. Everywhere you look there’s a meadow, a park. I’ve never been to a city where the urban bits and the green bits are so entwined. I can step out of my house and walk all the way into the city via parks and canals and get properly muddy along the way.
  2. It’s full of tourists. I thought Brighton was, but Oxford is on another level. I have a new hatred of walking tour groups (although I really want to go on one).
  3. It doesn’t have loads of swanky bars or cool coffee shops. That’s changing, but Brighton spoilt me, and Liverpool is full of both. Call me shallow but I’m missing the coffee/bar quotas I’ve had elsewhere.
  4. It’s as studious as you think it is. People go to the pub on a Friday night alone, with a laptop and do work. This is common. I will never do this.
  5. It’s deceptively near to a lot of places, which is a novelty having lived on the south coast for the last three years. As beautiful as it is down there, everywhere else is a MISSION to get to.

I’ll keep you posted. Have you ever had a ‘sod it lets change everything’ moment? I’d love to hear.

5 Comments

  1. Anne
    25th August 2017 / 10:36 pm

    Keep the faith Anna. It’s good to have the guts to try something new. Give it time. X

    • Anna
      27th August 2017 / 10:44 pm

      Love you! x

  2. Emma
    26th August 2017 / 9:54 pm

    Love this post! I’ve been having similar feelings of wanting to throw everything up in the air and change so it’s great to hear your story of actually doing it!

    • Anna
      27th August 2017 / 10:43 pm

      Good luck! Drop me a line if you ever need an ear from someone who’s been there! x

      • Emma
        28th August 2017 / 8:41 pm

        Thanks Anna! x

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